Inner self-proclaimed tranquility, where art thou?

The sickness of the world I have lived in was unreasonable. The tiny clasps of Satan's hold keeps choking my neck and dragging my soul, even to the day when I was about to break free from hell. I was ashamed and publicly humiliated in front of those piercing red eyes; that was totally uncalled for. Even after I left, false lies spread around like wildfire.

And now you sent me your false pretense. That could win you an Oscar for the fucking dramatic moment you have created. Give them three cheers for their act! Oh Lord please stop. I have this sick feeling throbbing my heart. Justice didn't fall on me. Karma is not siding with me. I am trapped between letting go and seeking revenge.

Wherefore art thou, inner peace? I need some zen in my heart. The pain is unbearable. I feel like going on a rampage; killing those who belittled and mistreated me. But what for? These monsters drove me to my breaking point yesterday; I found escapade through two drops of ecstasy. I needed a miracle, something that can make me believe in this life again.

I need to stop these visual images inside my brain before they turn me into a monster myself.