haunted houses



"YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY I DON’T LIKE HAUNTED HOUSES? BECAUSE THEY’RE JUST LIKE RELATIONSHIPS. YOU WALK IN ALL CONFIDENT, AND THEN ONCE YOU GET IN, IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA BE, AND IT’S SCARY!"

Nick Miller (New Girl, Season 2 Episode 6)

III

You think it's funny to be a mess but deep down you did not know how did it feel like to be criticized rudely and brutally by the fucking society.

She said.



She said:

"Dont look at me. I am fat, I dont deserve to be looked at."

She said:

"Dont bother me. I hate human-beings. Leave me the fuck alone."

She said:

"I hate you. I hate you so much it hurts my heart cause every time I hate you, I hate you with all my heart."

She said:

"I'm so lonely. I should just die and stop my heart from aching."

She said:

"I'm tired of people keep judging me. I wanna leave out all the mess and go away. God, take me away."

The next day, people found her dead. There were dried cuts with blood smeared all over her opened wounds on her right hand. Maybe she was just tired, of living the hell out of her life. Maybe some people should really just leave her alone and dont bother interfering her god damn life.

Too bad now she's dead.

Answers

Jane looked at the reflection of her. She looked miserable. Pain and addiction had turned her into a walking zombie. She's living, but dying from the inside. Clouds of worthless thought circled around her head, pestering her with a thousand of useless rants that she always tend to ignore. Jane looked at her face. The reflection was not that pretty. She didn't look pretty anymore. She looked awful, with bruises all over her face, hair fell down to cover most of her rotten face, she hid her smile with a smirk. 

If it wasn't for the drugs, she would not be this terrible.

But what should she do when everyone left and drugs stayed with her? What would be the answer for all the questions she had in mind? She was left alone, forgotten, and she was not even worth-waiting for anyone else now, not anymore. She's rotten, broken and in deep shit. She searched for the answers, but there was no one there. No one came to her and told her the answer. No one came to her. No one.

Jane looked at her reflection on the mirror. What a weird smile she had.

A smile that was once pure with honesty, now had turned into one of those fake smiles she had to wear to pretend everything was okay. No, nothing was okay. Everything was not okay. People left, she was trapped in a mess and there was no one to help her stand still. She lost her way to find heaven cause she had already found her way to be in hell. A worldly imagination of hell created by the infliction of the drugs she took. People left, but drugs stayed.

"If it wasn't for drugs, I would not be alive."

That day, the police found a young woman died of drug overdose. Jane finally left. Just like everyone else, who left her before she could get the answer. Too bad, she died without getting the answers to all of her questions.
and you asked me why i hate people?

and i will say, you are the reason why i hate people.

Ask her.



Ask her, if she was in pain before. Ask her, with a sincere look upon your face. Just go and ask her, what she had been through. Don't assume, go to her and ask. She might look strong, but we never know what pain she has inside her heart.

Go and ask her, if she was hurt before. Ask her what made her so sad. Don't just jump into conclusion, wait for her answers, wait for her to speak. Don't just simply make the ending for her story. Wait for her to finish telling her stories. She might not tell us directly, but we have no rights to judge her.

Just go and ask her, if she will be okay or not. Show her some sympathy. Smile to her, pat her back, wipe away her tears. Touch her face, warm her body with our hugs, caress her hair gently. Tell her everything will be alright. Just don't go and push her to stop crying. She might be crying like a child now, but we never know how she was hurt before.

Ask, if we want to know about something. Don't just decide on our own about other's life. Ask before concluding, who knows if that person might need help. Don't ask for the sake of spreading lies, telling his/her stories to everyone, just don't do that.

Ask, before it's too late to even save a soul from dying.

should i die so that i can please everyone around me now?




I try to stop hating people, I put the blame on myself, I blame my weakness for being hated by all. But, sometimes it hits me, what did I do wrong till everyone keeps bugging me, keeps hating me, keeps bitching about me behind my back. Is it because of my eccentric behavior? Is it because I'm too weak?

I hate people. I admit now, I hate people so much. I tried to stop hating them, I tried to not judging them, I keep myself in my own crypt, I avoid getting close to them, I stopped hanging out with them, I didnt even want to care about them at all but why should they treat me like shit? They treated me like I was a cunt, I was not allowed to say anything even though it hurts me a lot.

I am weak. I rant here. I smile to them, even though I didn't want to. I am weak, for being so stupid, thinking every human is great, every each of them is amazing, but the truth is they're not. They are just plain human beings. They talk bad behind you, they criticize you, they envy you.

I wonder if I die, will they shut their fucking mouth and fucking leave me alone? I dont want their attention, I just want to be alone. I dont need them to make me happy. I dont need anyone cause I choose whether I wanna be happy or sad. But, they are the reason why I feel so fucked up. Go away please, I dont even wanna know anything about you people. So leave me alone.

Fuck. I need to clear my mind. I'm just too upset.